#WeMenToo
If men are to end men’s violence against women, who would end women’s violence against men?
Any type of violence that harms a person physically/mentally/emotionally/psychologically or all, is called Domestic Violence. In India, domestic violence is considered as a crime & law provides relief as well as protection from it — unfortunately only to women! As far as I know, there is almost no provision in any law to protect men. Consequently, many wives use their rights in making false allegations with the ulterior motive of harassing the husbands & their families. Also I feel, including our government, everyone has been unable to take any stand on addressing the violence against the men.
Its the first time I’m openly coming out of being a victim of the same through this online publishing platform ‘Medium’. I can say that there are cases where women use the weapons of Domestic Violence & Dowry with a malafide intention to cause malicious damage to their spouse. All these become extortion tools for the wives. I have been falsely charged for Domestic Violence & Dowry. The mayhem in my life commenced 22 months ago & I’m still battling it out with my parents. It’s a myth that women don’t harass men. When people talk about equal rights, it should also include working on legal recourse for men. According to me (this is my personal opinion), there has to be some penalty imposed on the complainant & a system to withhold the identity of the one against whom the case is filed, until proven guilty so that the false accusers are deterred & weeded out. We have arrived at a stage, where any woman accusing a man is treated like a holy cow and nobody can question her intentions. You can always give a woman, the benefit of doubt, but in my case, with the help of concrete evidences & proofs, I can say that I was set up. Equality doesn’t make men the enemy, it means being pro-law and pro-justice. Justice is gender agnostic.
For men like me, who are facing false accusations, there is a complete absence of emotional as well as a legal support and that, is a growing concern. I agree that instances of men being harassed (like mine), are few, but when they surface, they are not treated with much seriousness. And that’s exactly why I feel there is a need of some amendment in the way marital cases are handled. I’m not saying women should not be protected, but, there should be checks and balances. It is like a Draconian law that is violating the already shrinking space of men’s rights in marriage & its open-endedness is making men vulnerable. There are many innocent men like me out there, who are falling victim to the gender-biased laws. Why can’t there be a National Commission for Men? Or the already existent NCW (National Commission for Women) can be renamed & restructured to make it gender neutral. I would like to end by saying that ‘Fathers, Brothers & Sons also have dignity.’
